Search

Sweet and Sour Lady

Life is like a bright, beautiful, round lemon… Sometimes sweet. Sometimes sour.

Tag

making memories

Have you called your mother today? Day 24 of 152…The Night of The Final Countdown

A Time For Everything    Ecclesiastes 3:1-11
A Time For Everything
Ecclesiastes 3:1-11

The day started off difficult from the time her swollen, discolored feet hit the floor. Her oxygen levels were low. Her blood pressure was low. She was retaining fluid and struggling to breathe.

Her sense of humor however, was well intact and on the rise. She made that clear during the daily weight maintenance routine as she managed to scoot the scale across the kitchen floor several times to re-weigh until she found a weight that satisfied her. She let us know by stating, “There! That’s the way I like it.”

Seeing her boisterous personality made New Year’s Eve a happy day for all of us. Even if another possible trip to Christus St. Vincent was the ‘elephant in the room‘. The day was full of monitoring her levels and peaked with raising her oxygen tank at an all time high.

The countdown to the drop of the Waterford Crystal Ball in Times Square was ticking away on NBC’s Dick Clark‘s Rockin’ Eve (even though it is now hosted with Ryan Seacrest) and so were the hours where everyone would be awake to watch Mommy sleep through the night; counting the seconds between each long pause before the next breath.

I decided to sleep on the couch with her.  At one point she put her perfectly manicured hand on my leg while we both dozed off.  Memories again began to flutter through my head. I slept with my mother for pretty much the first ten to twelve years of my life.  It was just the two of us most of that time. I can remember staying up to watch which celebrity Johnny Carson would have on The Tonight Show or which guest animal would pee on him! I enjoyed laughing along with her at Carol Burnett‘s silly antics on The Carol Burnett Show which also came on way too late for me to be up.

Memories… I know my children and I are making memories each and every day but which ones will stand out most to them forty, fifty, sixty years down the road when the roles are reversed? When they are taking care of me or when they are telling my grand babies stories of their mother. The thoughts make me smile. Happy smiles. Sincere smiles. Smiles that make me GLOW because I know that I am allowing God’s light to shine through me for Him and they see that. I also know that my mother sees that during this time of hers.

We went through so many things together: My mother and I. It only seems fitting to be going through this together too. Literally. Together. On the same couch. Counting down the same seconds of 2014, together.

Making memories~

Jennifer

Have you called your mother today? Day 23 of 152… We Will Talk About This Later

Funny how the roles reverse.  I’ve mentioned this before as far as the caretaker. I have noticed as of late, behaviors seem to reverse as well. Stubbornness. Sassyness. Defiance. Denial. Or maybe that is just my family.

Just today I had to tell my mother not to take a shower until I got home.  Very similar to something I would say to my children.  Of course, she didn’t mind me and took two tumbles.  My brother, John, and my husband, David, were thankfully home with her.  They were able to help her afterward.

When I arrived they told me what had happened. I tried to talk to her about it. She wouldn’t even look me in the eye. She raised her hand and simply said, “we will talk about this later.”  In other words, she was too embarrassed and knew what she had done risked the safety of her health.

Like a child, she got caught and hoped I would forget and not be as difficult on her if we waited until later to talk about it.  The truth is. I was not mad at her.  I was worried she was hurt. I was frieghtened at what could have happened.  Just like she would be if the role were reversed.  Just like I would be if I was in the same situation with one of my children.

One thing I have learned for sure from this entire experience with my mother; do not wait until later.  There may not be a later.

Making memories~

Jennifer

Have you called your mother today? Day 21 of 152… A Day of Celebration

Psalm 145:7
A Time of Celebration

We put on our party hats today! My mother had a full night of great sleep which has not happened in quite a while and we got to celebrate my husband, David’s, 44th birthday.  Happy Birthday Honey!!

Finally, a day of celebration.  Thanksgiving and Christmas have just passed but during both holidays, my mom was in the Christus St. Vincent hospital in Santa Fe, New Mexico which added stress and concern both times.

This time, she might not have been able to help prepare in the kitchen or even sing at the table with us but she was at least under the same roof.

Celebrating the little things.  Mother’s Day 2015 will be on day 152. Now that celebration…That will be a BIG ONE!

Making memories~

Jennifer

Have you called your mother today? Day 20 of 152…Forgive or Forget

Saturdays.  For some, a day of leisure. For some, a day of labor. Just any other day to many others. On this particular Saturday we received confirmation. Confirming news that my mother will get to leave Christus St. Vincent’s hospital in Santa Fe, New Mexico after receiving a stent in her arteries and go home. Again.

We are thankful for her release because we know that will lift her spirits. We also received confirming news on further test results. Results that answer so many questions regarding attitudes, hurts…pain that resulted in ill behavior by many of us.  All forgiven. Now, what to do with the new results? Continue to forgive or forget? Both.

Matthew 18:21-22 (NIV)

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked,”Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

Making memories~

Jennifer

Have you called your mother today? Day 22 of 152… A Time To Refresh

Create a time to refresh~not just the toes
Create a time to refresh~not just the toes

It’s a treat not to have to call my mother on days when I get to sit right beside her and have meaningful conversations face to face.  I enjoy not having to discuss her medical condition all the time.  Today we enjoyed a little girl time.  I was able to give her a mini-pedicure. I haven’t done that in thirty years!

She keeps flexing her toes to admire the freshly shaped nails and color.  All girls enjoy having pretty toes! Right? Right!

I have several friends who remember spending the night with me when I was younger who also remember painting my mother’s toenails at the sleepover.  Funny! I wonder how she bribed us into doing that?

New goal-Spend more time with my girls painting toenails…not at the spa but at home.  Create time..time to cleanse, time to refresh…not just the toes.

Once again. Memories. They settle in so deeply that you forget about them for years until a tiny wisp brings them back up for air. Could it be an angel fluttering by? My imagination would like to think so.

Making memories~

Jennifer

 

Have you called your mother today? Day 14 of 152…The Fine Art of Taking Control

A little frustration set in today.  Not with me but with my mother.  My brother and I were trying to get her medications lined out for the week in her pill containers. She, of course, wanted to be in control.

My siblings and I have been rotating taking care of her.  It is currently my younger brother, John’s, week. We were on the phone trying to figure out things that would be much easier to handle if we were together, in person, handling these things.

But, now, during this season in our life, we are buckling down and doing what we need to do, what we have to do, how we can.  My mother on the other hand insists that she can handle it all and does not need our help.

She has always been one of the most independent people I know.  She has never wanted anyone to do anything for her. It’s a fine art giving up control of the things you once did so easily and it’s also a fine art of taking over the things someone once took for granted.

As I decorated a set of bookshelves tonight over my desk, I positioned each book, decorative piece, and candlestick perfectly..or perfectly in my perspective.  I’ll know if anyone has moved them or disturbed them.  I get that from my mother.  She loves to decorate and when she feels good (like me) there is a place for everything and everything has it’s place. A control thing.

But in the end, do the bookshelves even matter? Do the pill containers even matter? No. What matters is that we have someone there to help us. What matters is that we are not alone. Don’t wait until the end to give control up to God; to get your priorities straight. It’s a fine art. But it’s easier than you think.

Making memories~

Jennifer

Have you called your mother today? Day 12 of 152…I Admit, I Didn’t

Well, I didnt.  I didn’t call her. IT WAS THE FIRST DAY I DIDN’T CALL HER!!!! The challenge was to call your mother every day until Mother’s Day 2015.  For me, there were 152 days until Mother’s Day when I started my challenge.  The count may have been different for you.  So, I missed a day.  I have talked to her more than once on many other days.  Not that that counts.  I did miss a day.  But I’m not quitting.  I’m not giving up on the challenge. I’m not giving up on my mother, this blog or this…This commitment.

It was a Friday. The day I didn’t call my mother was a Friday.  I almost made it two full weeks.  That is 14 days of the challenge. But on this particular Friday the kids once again got out of school for early dismissal because of Christmas break.  This time however, I drove my oldest out of town, my middle one needed to be picked up extra early because he could not handle the unstructured end of school environment (he has autism, or Aspergers rather) and my youngest invited her three besties to spend the night with us to watch her dance recital. Just a typical day at the Taylor House.

In the middle of all of that, David took our iphones in to AT&T to be updated and I had no service for a couple of hours…yes, while at the dance recital with four girls.  I was stressing.  What was that I said yesterday?

Embrace the moments…?!…?!…

I was definitely enjoying all the dancing and all the laughter.  Time was flying by.  I would not have traded it for the world.  As the clock was ticking, I knew that as each minute passed I was missing a chance to talk to my mother before she fell fast asleep for the evening.

I was thankful that I had talked to her only yesterday and that it had not been days or weeks or even months.  She knew what the day held for me.

So if you haven’t called your mother today and you aren’t too busy to stop and do so.  Do so.

Making memories~

Jennifer

 

Have you called your mother today? Day 11 of 152…Time To Manage Time

How is one possibly late to every single thing in one day? How is that possible? My second question is how is that possible before noon?

I wake up at 6:00 AM.  I have bible time, prayer time, coffee time, mommy duty time which includes getting the kids fed, lunches made and to school. I get home and usually have a few chores to do.

Today, I happened to have had a few extra things on my list.  I had an appointment at 9:45 AM, I had to bring a fruit tray to the class party which began at 10:15 AM and early dismissal was at 11:15 AM and my oldest got out of school at 12:40 PM.

David and I had another appointment at 1:30 PM and Grant’s piano recital was at 5:30 PM.  I was late to every single thing EXCEPT the recital thank goodness!!!!

But how??? Maybe one thing.  I could handle one thing. But everything? I’m burning at both ends rapidly and I don’t like the outcome.

My job is to take care of my children, my husband and my family including my parents.  But I can’t do that if I don’t take care of myself.  I do realize that.  I definitely don’t want to stress myself out so much trying to be super woman that I end up where I can’t take care of anyone again like I have been before.

Time to watch the warning signs. Take a deep breath. Embrace the things that matter. Like people. Prioritize the tasks that can wait. Like chores.

Making memories~

Jennifer

 

Have you called your mother today? Day 10 of 152…Errors and Do Overs

A day of errors and do overs.  I’ve been looking forward to today for quite some time.  Today is “cut and color” day and boy does my hair need it! It has been far too long.  It’s time for a do over.

This week is crazy busy with all the scheduled and unscheduled events to get ready for Christmas break so I can’t afford any mix-ups, tardies or errors.

Oops! I should not have said that.  I know better.

I talked to my mother for several minutes this morning before asking about her blood pressure only to find out that it is so low the cuff can’t read it correctly.  Instead, it gives an “error” code.  Wait just a minute.  I said I couldn’t have errors today.  Not even electronic ones.

Stop right there Mr. Blood Pressure cuff.  Do your job.  Give me a reading and it better be a good one.  Don’t make me come through this phone.  I’ve got things to do and an appointment with some bleach!

Whew…finally.  A good reading.  Well, a reading at least.  Not the numbers we hoped for but at least not an error.  Something to go with.  Something to work off of.  A do over.

By evening time, there was one more do over for the day.  A chance to recover from another error. A major flop in the kitchen.  The last time I made chicken ‘n dumplings, the dumplings well…… were….let’s just say not really dumplings….or anything for that matter.

So I was determined to recover. Recover greatly I might add.

My mother had passed down the cookware of all cookware.  A key lime green Le Creuset pot.  How could I possibly go wrong?  So I called a friend for back up tips…. just in case. (Thanks Jo!)

The results. Fabulous.

Great blood pressure. (For my mom and for me.)

Great hair.

Great dinner.

Mistakes are best if you learn from them.

Making memories~

Jennifer

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: